Rhythm carries us. Structures and routines support us. Once a behavior is repeated enough times, it becomes easier to perform without conscious thought. It’s great when routines are healthy and intentional. If we had to reinvent our morning to get out the door, I’m not sure most of us would make it. Step one: coffee with the established knowledge that speaking is not acceptable… fill in after that. That tightly dialed-in process allows the mind to work on bigger ideas and maximize time. Most routines begin with a purpose. A morning workout improves energy. The weekly team meeting keeps everyone informed. Over time, however, routines can drift away from the reasons they were created. What once supported growth can quietly become automatic, exhausting, or even counterproductive. Routines should serve you, not trap you.
Signs It Is Time to Reassess the Routine
You know a routine or habit needs to shift when you feel more drained than supported by it. If the habit doesn’t fit your priorities or you’re just doing it out of guilt, it is time to reassess. Sometimes the biggest tell is if you can’t figure out how it is giving you any benefit. If the habit is so unconscious that you can’t remember what it is supposed to give you, it probably needs to go.
Reassess the Habit
Reassessing a habit isn’t necessarily about dumping the entire idea. I got really sick of doing endless laundry. The first natural thought was to better distribute laundry duties across the family members. However, I’ve seen other people in my family do laundry, and I reject the idea of stuffing as much as possible into the washer and washing it on the hot setting. I was told this was a good idea because the hot water would “kill the germs.” After a deep sigh and noting that this would also kill my sweaters, I settled on another approach. I noticed that a lot of clothes going through the wash looked perfectly fine. I set a strict new rule that maybe came with a few threats. If it doesn’t stink or have a stain, HANG IT UP. Magically, the amount of laundry halved itself. The habit of dropping anything into the wash without thought was interrupted, and a new efficiency was born. The need for doing laundry hadn’t changed, but with a little creative thought, a more effective approach was found. Many of our habits just need a tweak, not a demolition. Consider the idea that a habit could be better, not abandoned.
Separate Identity From the Habit
Excellent! You’ve made it into a higher-level position. The executive ranks have your name among them. All you have to do is train the new person for your job. Yet, somehow, that “all” is starting to feel like “all encompassing,” not just a quick hoop jump. You find yourself doing a lot of the new person’s job and struggling with the definition and expectations of what your new role should entail.
When we are changing roles or amending into a new structure, it is important to know that we often have attachments to the old way of doing things. We tend to get nostalgic about the way things were and feel a loss in letting go of them. The old structure felt comfortable, and we miss feeling knowledgeable in it, while finding a new path may feel uncomfortable and challenging. It is important that we honor this time of adjustment, even grieve it, and not be judgmental with ourselves. We need to get support while completing a shift because change can directly challenge our sense of identity. Enlist other allies in reinforcing our new identity and stay accountable to the shift by regularly reviewing the objectives of the new identity.
Build Slowly While Assessing Results
Buckle up and get comfortable in the uncomfortable. Creating new routines is never easy. Targeting one area at a time and assessing the results is the best way to build a new habit that is sustainable. Often, we want everything to be different tomorrow. We can see all the habits that need to change, and we want to tackle them at the same time. This approach is about as successful as my last decade of New Year’s resolutions. The key is to choose a targeted area and focus on it while experimenting with what is going to work. It is a process, not a switch.
Let Structure Serve You
Routines are powerful because they provide support to do our highest level of thinking and creativity. They dial in the mundane so that we can dial up the innovation and expertise. They influence health, relationships, productivity, and emotional well-being without demanding constant decisions. But they are there to serve us and have to evolve just as we and our environments are evolving. Bringing awareness to the results we want to receive allows us to question, tailor, and amend our routines to serve us.
