Perfectionism is the death of all good ideas! This usually generates eyerolls from my highly driven, successful clients when I say it because in a world that celebrates high achievement, stating that one shouldn’t seek perfection comes off as if I’m asking them to watch Frozen and sing “Let it Go” with me while we attend a self-help seminar. Cute perhaps, but definitely not a strategy for optimizing growth in the real world. Yet the reality is that when perfectionism is released, success soars. Turns out that learning to pursue excellence and good enough is the true optimizer of thriving and accomplishment.
What is perfectionism?
Perfectionism is the relentless pursuit of flawlessness. It’s driven by fear — fear of failure, fear of judgment, and often, fear of not being good enough. Perfectionists set impossibly high standards for themselves and others. This fear of living in the shame of not being enough creates a paralysis that shuts down the evolution of ideas and momentum. The focus shifts to every mistake or perceived shortcoming, filtering only for what is wrong while generating even more energy around failure and limiting progress.
What is excellence?
Excellence, on the other hand, is the pursuit of the best possible outcome available — for now. It is constantly improving, changing, growing, and looking for openings. It’s driven by passion, curiosity, collaboration, and a desire to grow. Excellence allows us to embrace challenges, learn from failure, and seek to put energy towards progress.
Perfectionism vs. excellence
The gaping difference between these two is that perfectionism is fueled by fear, and excellence is powered by passion and curiosity. The core motivation behind any of our actions and reactions determines the exponential lasting impact on us. Excellence wants to experiment and find what will work and build on that. It is sustainable, and the motivation generates energy while perfectionism drains and immobilizes us in a self-defeating spiral.
So usually at this point, I’m getting shoulder shrugs and forced smiles from my clients because the semantics of the differences feels like a mission statement in the office of a towing company. A nice thought about customer service, but not the reality of my experience while paying the fee to get my car out of being impounded.
Results tell all
Results always tell us the truth about what is going on. Since perfectionism is fear-driven, the results will induce even more fear. In meetings, if everyone is quiet and afraid to share ideas or if ideas are shot down instantly, that would be a strong indication that the culture is in the throes of perfectionism. If you’re in a culture that fears mistakes instead of milking them for betterment, then the litmus test for perfectionism is clear. If you can’t get started on a beloved dream or idea because you’re waiting for the perfect moment or plan, then yup, you’ve tested positive for perfectionism. However, if the passion for the work is carried forward, one can be sure that excellence is the driving force. If resilience is celebrated and honored, then congratulations! You’re in the front seat with excellence. If judgment is replaced with curiosity, then excellence is rocking with you.
Which leads me to say that one of the dearest complements to excellence is the knowledge to know when to half-ass it. My PhD would have me say “modulated energy management,” but I think half-ass says it best. The truth is that we cannot be all-in all the time. You don’t need to drive a Formula 1 race car to Costco. That minivan is going to have a better trunk for the bulk toilet paper. Excellence includes learning what needs your full passion and energy and what needs to be a hoop-jumping check-off. When you are driven by excellence, you are in a state of curiosity and can astutely strategize where to put your efforts. If you’re in the pursuit of perfectionism, you’ll be confused and knee deep in the point-by-point engine stats and miss the objective. Perfectionism forces us into the weeds while excellence allows us to embrace the broader goals.
Final thoughts
Perfectionism is a limiting, defeating illusion, while excellence is a broadening journey. When we embrace excellence, we value effort, growth, curiosity, and continued evolution. We celebrate each step of our development, knowing it isn’t the last and that every challenge is our choice to turn to gold. With excellence, we step into our fullest potential.
